How we are doing...

Many of you have asked, how we are...first let me say thank you. And honestly, its day by day, minute by minute. There are times we are so thankful that my mother is not in pain, that she exited this world with us by her side and at peace with our Lord in heaven - and there are times I am so sad,crying, totally mad at the world and ready to lose it!

But one thing I do know, is we are lucky to have eachother, the good memories and most of all our amazing friends. Every day I receive tons of encouraging cards-that make me cry, yesterday I got another gift and then a good friend came over with 7 frozen meals made by other friends! I cannot thank you all enough, you are the ones getting me through this...you are. You all are truly amazing, you are a gift to me daily. It never fails, every time I get sad, the doorbell or the phone rings-it is such a blessing to know that during a very dark time I am not alone.


The end of last week I was able to focus on Chandlers 10th Birthday...so that helped. Sunday I went to Church, I almost had a panic attack entering! But as usual the Lord and good friends took care of me! This morning I met a friend at the pool and tonight is dinner at another friends.I t's been nice staying busy, those quiet times are really hard. I am still not sleeping, I am hoping that will end soon. The visions of my mother come, every time I shut my eyes. In Feb. we did a bible study titled the Mission of Motherhood- that forced me to do alot of soul searching about Mothering, I had no idea and didnt really really face the fact that I could lose mine. It has certainly hit me harder then I ever imagined.


Chads okay, checking on me alot...pouring into me and the kids...seeing and experiencing what we did, is life changing. Chandler is up and down, he keeps sneaking outside in the garage to look at all my mothers belongings, and crying...and Bray is full of energy and running around silly and crazy!

Heres a couple photos I just found:

ABOVE: This is us, the night after our mom died...we were sharing stories and trying to celebrate her life. We were all doing a peace sign, because thats all my mom ever did...always. We never got her out of the hippie stage!

ABOVE: This picture is at the dinner after the funeral. MeLynda was thanking everyone for coming, sharing some silly stories about our four day slumber party in ICU...and most of all saying how blessed we were in the situation we were given and lucky we are to have such amazing friends and family. (her arms are around my grandfather)

ABOVE: Sean, MeLynda and I giving my Aunt Eileen my mothers jewelry box. Our thank you for staying with us in the hospital during those tough days. I dont know what we have done without out her. We needed her as a nurse, aunt and friend. I am so grateful to her!

ABOVE: This is all of us with my Uncle Paul (on my moms side)- he flew in from Tennessee to be the minister for her funeral. He was just in Ohio 3 weeks earlier visiting my mother. It was such a beautiful blessing having him there and getting to know him better.

ABOVE: After the funeral and dinner, we all went back to my sisters house to share more stories and go through old photos. I truly enjoyed that.

So, I love you all. I cannot thank you enough. You have touched my heart in so many ways. During such a hard time, I am blessed to have you. Everyday I feel the Lord working on me...I can feel your hugs and prayers and I can feel my mother watching over us as well.

~Melissa